Thursday, March 13, 2008


You knew it was going to come to this, eventually, didn't you?

Wende made a firm friend out of me during my first cure because of the husband. I was whining about him and his horrible painting habits while scrapping up miniscule paint spots off my dining room floor (from the red paint job, not the nice new French Vanilla one) and she responded, "Your whole relationship is on that floor."

Well, you can bet it is in the basement too. Specifically two drawers I rediscovered tonight chocker block full, not nails and screws (those are in the workshop, which is why I'm not going in there), no, not 14 IKEA allen keys (tossed those last cure), no, not even obsolete remote controls and electrical whatnots (that's another drawer) but,...envelopes. Yes, we have two drawers full, in three different sizes--a few packages not even opened. Remember the fling boogie where I mentioned I got rid of 700 lbs? At that time, and that was a few years ago, I asked him if I could toss them. Nope, they'll "come in handy, someday."

So, I guess I'm not exactly upset at my husband but everyone and anyone who wants to keep things "in case they'll come in handy."

Including me.


drwende said...

Omigoodness -- I'd forgotten that, but it does sound like something I would have said, partly because I'm the only person in my family tree who has ever voluntarily gotten rid of anything.

There are boxes I will never touch because I want to stay happily married, and if I worried about what was in those boxes, I would be filled with rage.

Alana in Canada said...

Are you sure you want to say that? In public? I can delete that comment for you. (Not that I'm sure that would do any good.)

Actually, he's growing and changing, too. He just might surprise me.

drwende said...

Why not say it? Every married woman has some issue with her husband's habits that makes her blood boil; that's part of what keeps the excitement in the relationship.

Alana in Canada said...

It is?

drwende said...

Uh oh! Are you on the "wives submit to your husbands" track and I've just been wildly offensive?

Alana in Canada said...


Good grief, not at all. It would take more than a difference of perspective to offend me--I just didn't understand the passion you expressed about the differences. Of course, it could have been my interpretation of what you may have meant by "excitement." My mind is never very far away from the gutter, unfortunately.

As for submission, yeah, I think I ought. I'm not very good at it, though.

J-fer Rose said...

If you knew what you know now, would you have married your husband? I love my boyfriend so much and think we could actually work out. But the thing that scares me is that he buys things constantly and doesn't get rid of things. He's at his storage locker right now. I'm a minimalist at heart.

We don't live together and I fear that he would drive me batty if we did. And yet, I still want to-- and I could imagine us being happy together for the rest of our lives.

What's your perspective?

Alana in Canada said...

J-fer...If you think he will drive you batty if you get married, you just need to know how well you can stand it.

Does he have a problem: that is, could he give up buying his stuff if he had too?

I really can't give any marriage advice except to say that marriage is a whole lot more about day to day living than it is about feeling love all the time.

It's also about how you resolve differences. In our house, my husband has the last word...but sometimes we discuss things for years before it comes down to the "last word."

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