Five Minute Friday: Awake

Assignment: (from The Gypsy Mama): For only five short, bold, beautiful minutes. Unscripted and unedited. We just write without worrying if it’s just right or not.

The theme this week: Awake.

GO.

Awake!

The ceremony is about to begin!

Jim Morrison and The Doors. William Blake. The Doors of Perception. It was all about seeing clearly. It was all about trying to get at the truth. Truth--though the Universe, as we saw it then was amoral. Not immoral--just, neutral. People made up morality People decided what was right and wrong. Questions of how we decided and who decided and all that were for the future. We were existential teenagers, born past the age of drugs and on the cusp of AIDs. We had the books, though. And music. We read, we talked. We looked, we felt. We did all we could to be alive, and awake.

But, truly, looking back now I see it was all through a glass, darkly. We hadn't the eyes to see or the ears to hear. Our quest was impossible--as it always is for the young and idealistic. The romantic.

Yet, I cannot imagine what life would have been like without the quest. Quieter, perhaps. Less disappointing? Who knows. It was what it was and we are left with our memories and our love among the ruins. We won't re-build. We'll find something new.

STOP.

Five Minute Friday: Open

This is an experiment I am going to try this year. I want to improve my writing. I found Five Minute Friday, hosted by Gypsy Mama a long time ago and I did not have the courage, then, to try.

But I might, now.

Gypsy Mama offers a topic each week. Here are the terms and conditions, straight from her site:

1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. Most important: visit, comment, encourage the person before you.

This is my first attempt.

GO

Open.

Open doors. Open windows. Open minds. Open.

Change. Winds. Fear. Future. To be open is to be accepting, to be willing to receive what may come. But no. I want to be out in front of the change, directing it: bringing it myself.

I am scared of being open. Open is not good. ZOpen means access and there's a gate on that, thank you very much. I can't post this. I have nothing to say.

But I want this year to change me. I want to stay the same: I don't want my comforts to disappear--I want the need for them to disappear. But how can that happen with out change? Without a willingness to be open?

But, I do control the door, the window. I do stand in front of it and raise and lower it. I can be open and protected, too right?

(Wow. Five minutes is a long time).

So, maybe I can open my arms, at least, a little way. Change will come anyway whether I'm in front of it or not.

I guess that's OK.

STOP

That was awful.
Well, I suppose that just means there's room for improvement.
(I really don't want to hit publish, but I really must, mustn't I?)